14 способов испортить секс

By following these rules, you are sure to experience the most unforgettable night of your life. Just keep in mind that you will remember it with a bashful blush on your cheeks and a desire to sink through the ground.
Laugh at his figure
He's not an Apollo, and honest girls can't lie (which is obvious). An Aphrodite like you shouldn't be sleeping with a man who last went to the gym in the last century.
Criticize your
Cellulite on the ass, the creases on the stomach, thick sides, poorly done hair removal, old manicure — how could he not notice it! You just have to point out all your shortcomings.
Be silent as a partisan
Do not dare to say what you want, do not even think to voice that you are not satisfied with something. There must be a mystery in a girl.
Nothing excites a man like a woman who can barely stand on her feet. A dozen cocktails would be enough.
Imagine that you are an Opera singer and perform your best Aria. It's okay if he just kissed you on the neck. He will believe that you experienced the best orgasm of your life.
Turn on the TV (radio, " iPod»)
It's so boring in bed with him that words can't describe it, but according to the rules, you can't tell him about it. So while he's working there, uh, downstairs, watch an episode of your favorite TV show, and to drown out the TV sounds, yell, as mentioned above.
Don't forget about Instagram
You put out food, new purchases, friends should know what you do in the evenings.
Sex is hilarious
Do not be afraid to laugh loudly and loudly, especially when he remains in his underwear, and even better — when he does not have them at all.
Follow the rules
A friend said that sex should start with a 20-minute foreplay and nothing else, and one magazine wrote that sex toys are used by perverts. Do not dare to contradict the experts of your desires.
Don't think about your partner
You want to experiment, so it's time to act. Just think, he is against passionate sex in front of the neighbors, you are interested in it.
Quickly run away from the crime scene
Why all this hugging, talking, and in General, why be around when all the terrible things are over. The best time to leave is after he falls asleep, and remember, you should not warn about your departure.
Be sure to answer the phone
Just think, you are at the peak of passion, and suddenly it calls a friend to say that she bought "the same dress" on sale.
Give your partner a different name
We are all human beings, and names are nothing.
Be sure to point out what a childish cute tummy he has and how you want to squeeze him, because he really looks like a Teddy bear.

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